How One Man Opened Up the Dark Side in Me

To unleash the shadow side we all love to hide, we must be honest about it before we can change it

As I listened to the latest news swirling around Washington, I sighed. Since 2016, my head and heart have suffered over COVID, all the natural disasters hitting many due to climate change, as well as the daily hateful comments spewed not just by politicians but amongst our neighbors as well.

Turning off the TV and heading for a glass of wine to calm down, I thought back to when so much of the nastiness came to the surface and, for a moment, I thought, perhaps there’s something good to be found in having Trump once as our president.

Now, please, before you jump up and down to scream at me for my betrayal of my Democratic roots, or to cheer me on for my newfound wisdom, let me explain. It’s not for his political prowess, gentle nature, or intelligence (although he did tout himself as a stable genius). Putting his politics aside, I find him loathsome as a human being, but this heavy emotion deep within one day woke me to my own dark side.

Now that I’m in my sixties, I want to ingest as much knowledge as possible. In my youth, new ways of thought or information were either irrelevant, tedious to consume, or just plain dull. Back then, I had bigger fish to fry, like dating the new flavor of the month or what dance or party was on my social calendar. Today, I love being a 24/7 student of life, one of the reasons I’ve enjoyed being on Medium for I’m constantly learning something new. My most recent topic of study? Carl Jung’s theory on the shadow side, “the unconscious aspect of our personalities which our conscious ego doesn’t identify itself with.” In other words, that side of us we don’t want to believe is really there.

For example, one might admonish others for being lazy while they zip around efficient and productive in public, but behind closed doors, Netflix the day away. Or maybe the fundamentalist Christian who speaks of God, the Bible, and love for humankind but disparages gays and lesbians. Then there are those who believe they are inclusive of everyone and honor who they are, but there’s that one ethnic group that rubs the wrong way, so unkind remarks grumble under the breath and all will done not to be anywhere near them.

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