I Saw Keanu Reeves Farting on Reuben Salsa

Keanu Reeves can produce a Hawaiian breeze at will. He farts and has a beautiful penis, like all the beautiful humans on this wonderful planet.

Smartphone

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Dispatches From the Panopticon

More on how the system is watching us

A previous essay of mine described how police are illegally eavesdropping on our cellular telephone conversations while thumbing their noses at the law.

The article describes the legal contracts that police departments sign with companies that produce the spying equipment. These contracts impose civil penalties on purchasers should they disclose their purchase and use of the equipment. Police departments are therefore placing themselves outside the law and getting away with it.

Readers can access that article by clicking on the hyperlink at the close of this essay.

The only evasive action that conscientious judges can take is to throw out cases in which evidence was gleaned through illegal techno-spying, much to the displeasure of police and prosecutors after a huge waste of taxpayers’ money. But that’s how our society works. Other societies, such as China, have taken techno-spying to such lengths as to be irreversible, their citizens long ago having thrown up their hands in capitulation and despair.

If you think that monitoring your cellular communications, including what websites you visit (PornHub, OnlyFans, Bonga Cams, The Dark Web, you-name-it) is an invasion of privacy and an assault on your freedoms, then brace yourselves for more distressing news.

Cellular communications monitoring is only the tip of a humongous iceberg (I just love the allusion to ICE, the American Gestapo) coming fast-fast-fast in our direction. Soon you won’t be able to scratch your nose, never mind that persisting itch to visit the nearest Asian Spa, without some faceless government automaton logging the impulse into your data file.

Take Digital Acoustic Sensing (DAS), for instance. DAS is a system of surveillance with which the existing fiber optic networks in our cities and towns, and even rural areas, are used to monitor not only the condition of municipal infrastructure but even the movements and activities of citizens themselves. Like every other small freedom or shred of privacy we give up in the name of security, DAS purports to help fight crime, once again trading freedom for safety. “Be safe, kids!”

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